let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
