i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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