nutella sex= disaster
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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