My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
