Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
