when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Randomize
