Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
