i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Randomize