I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
