I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
