i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
