wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
