Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
