Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
