I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
