I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
