happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
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