your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
