forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
