Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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