you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
