Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
