The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
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