You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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