Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I hate all girls vehemently.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize