Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize