The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
