I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
