She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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