Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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