got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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