I want to have your abortion
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
