it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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