...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
