a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
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