D3 body, D1 cock
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
