apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
