I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
