Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Randomize
