I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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