Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Randomize
