whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize