K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize