I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
