He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize