:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i barfeds in our rink
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize