yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
