I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
