it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
