for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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