whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
